Dunk of the Week ...

Our friends at CNNSI.com (we love those folks, they put us in their Local News for the Spurs) have raised our holiday cheer in a most unexpected and unlikely fashion with a TOP DUNK OF THE WEEK award going to one of our fav players here...

Oh Boy!

"Eva Longoria to tie the knot with her beau, San Antonio Spurs basketball star Tony Parker"

Here is some breaking news from the AP newswire:

"Tony flew into Los Angeles last night after his game and surprised Eva at her home as she got off work," Liza Anderson told The Associated Press on Thursday via e-mail.

"The proposal was romantic and perfect. The couple plans to wed in France in the summer of 2007 in what they describe as a big, happy ceremony with lots of family and friends."

The 31-year-old Longoria, who plays crafty Gabrielle Solis on the hit ABC show, met Parker, a 24-year-old Frenchman, in the San Antonio Spurs' locker room after a game two years ago.

It Just Doesn't Matter

Game 15 vs. Golden State: Warriors 111, Spurs 102
Record: 11-4 Streak: L-1

The Spurs lost to the Warriors last night, and it was big news in the Bay Area.

Spur-prise! Warriors Top S.A.
Golden State deals Duncan and Co. their first road loss of the season

BEAST OF THE BEST
Spurs join Jazz as latest losers at Oracle Arena

Normally I'd be disappointed, except that it just doesn't matter.

So what does matter?

• I got to see this game with the other SpursDynasty writers. Michael, thanks for extending your long weekend.
  
• This was just one game in an 82-game season. Gotta keep things in perspective.
  
• Only the Utah Jazz have a better record than the Spurs (although the Mavericks are catching up very quickly). The Spurs and Jazz play tonight, and the oddsmakers favor the Spurs by a point.
  
• Golden State is hot right now, having beaten the two best teams in the NBA -- Utah and San Antonio -- in the past three days.
  
• The Spurs had not lost on the road until last night, so they were due.
  
• It would have been a different game had Manu Ginobili and Baron Davis not been injured.
  
• The Spurs continue to fair poorly in back-to-back games.
  
• SpursDynasty.com is now featured on Sports Illustrated's Spurs page.

Sleepy in San Diego

Game 14 @ Seattle: Spurs 98, Sonics 78

Well, it's time to reset the Manu-counter to 0, my friends.



We knew it wouldn't last forever, and quite frankly, I think if Vegas had the prop bet, 13 games would've easily covered the "over." Actually I think in a weird way, it's an encouraging sign. For him to be hurt, it means he was playing aggressively. No way he's gonna get banged up jacking threes all game like he was doing vs. the Bulls and at Sacramento. So really, I'm not interested in the "When" question as in "When is he gonna play again?" as much as I am the "How" question as in, "How will he play when he does come back?"

I'm not even worried about the jumping/explosion part of it. All the injuries he had last year were with his ankles/feet. The other stuff is no big deal. Heck, when Brent Barry nicknamed him "El Contusión" it was during the '04-'05 season, when he Gino was cramming it on everybody.

No, the odd part of the game was watching it simultaneously with the Eagles-Colts game at my friend's sports bar. Well, actually the game was played in Indianapolis, I just watched it on TV at a sports bar. Just to clear that up. So probably for the first time ever, I was viewing my favorite NFL and NBA teams at the same time.

To say there was a noticable contrast between the two teams would be an understatement. It was more like a real life a Highlights "Goofus & Gallant" cartoon come to life.








"Ewww...Riverwalk "Yummy! Fuck Mark Cuban,
Trout Casserole! Yuk! fuck him in the ear!"


Whereas the Eagles played defense all night long like it was sorority two hand touch, the Spurs' D turned it up a notch on the overmatched Sonics when it counted, holding Seattle to only five points in the final 7:53 and turning a 76-73 game into a laugher. It's never a good sign for your favorite football team when they play less phsyically than your favorite basketball team. It's probably also not a good sign if they depend on a French guy, a Dutch guy, a Slovenian, two Argentians, and a 6-10 paintball fanatic from the Virgin Islands. On a positive note though, I'm almost positive Jackie Butler could play defensive tackle for Philly.

Anyway, not only did Bowen grab, hold, pester and smack Jesus Shuttlesworth into a 21 points on 20 FGA performance, but their other All-Star poser Rashard Lewis scored a measly three buckets. I think Eric Williams had more of an impact on the game, just by sending vicious farts in the Sonics' general direction. Of course, to Tony, nothing was amiss. Those lovable French!



(But really, they're quite filthy people. I'm not even joking. I mean, thanks for all your help in The Revolutionary War and all that, but seriously, shower.)

Your 3 Stars!

3) Robert Horry- I figured I'd throw him a bone. He actually sank a couple of threes in the fourth. In a completely unrelated coincedence, I saw the sun shine off my dog's ass today while he was chasing this blind squirrel who had just found an acorn.

2) Fabricio Oberto- Dude just doesn't miss shots. He had like ten straight points in the 3rd to get the 2nd half going. He is singlehandedly saving Duncan from having an assist/turnover ratio of .25 or something horrid.

1) Tony Parker- He had like 12 points in the 4th quarter. Yay. Our point guard can get hisself sum bucketz. If you're into that kinda thing.

Record: 11-3 Streak: W-1
Up Next: @ Golden State Warriors
I hear Manu is out for this one too. What kind of idiots will they find to pay good money for this shit then? It's gonna be another tough second night of a back to back for us. I hope nothing disastrous happens like Andres Biedrins swatting Timmy five times or Mike Dunleavy scoring 18 on us.

Mavs Take Their Turn

Game 13 vs. Dallas: Mavericks 95, Spurs 92
Record: 10-3 Streak: L-1

I spent the day after Thanksgiving hooking up a TiVo dual tuner for my sister-in-law and her husband -- an early Christmas gift from my wife and I -- and eagerly anticipating Game 13 in the epic Spurs-Mavericks series that began last November.

The Spurs and Mavs played to a 2-2 draw during the 2005-2006 regular season, then went down to the wire in their 7-game playoff series, with three games decided by a bucket or less. The Spurs won earlier this month, tying the series at six games a piece, so I guess I should have expected that the Mavericks would take their turn to win this one. But the game was at home, so I was optimistic. That changed about two minutes into the first quarter. By quarter's end, the Spurs were down by 14 and I was looking for someplace to hide.

The Spurs made it interesting, taking the lead briefly in the the third, despite more lousy freethrow shooting from Tim Duncan. (I wasn't surprised when Tim made all three shots after drawing a foul from behind the arc with just 12 seconds left, but he was 6-for-12 before that.)

There was faint praise from Pop about the team's play.

"They did a great job for 48 minutes. We did a great job for a half."

Fabricio Oberto, who Popovich called the Spurs' "most consistent player," had 14. Manu Ginobili did not play in the fourth quarter, and the Spurs said that he had a lower back contusion.

This time last year, the Spurs were also 10-3. Good news. Even better news, this year all three losses have been at home. That trend won't hold up. Overall, it was a disappointing loss to the team we're almost certain to face in the Western Finals this year, but not all bad. At least the TiVo I installed didn't turn all the players blue.

The Spurs Win a Blowout, Manu Dunks, and I'm Still Feeling Blue

Game 12 Vs. Miami: Spurs 106, Heat 86



TiVo isn’t nearly the modern miracle people make it out to be. At least it’s not at my mother’s house anyway. After an uneventful, on-time flight home Wednesday night on Alaska Airlines, (I totally recommend them by the way, it was a welcome change of pace from my usual airline that always hassles me at the security checkpoint and always has its flights delayed – I won’t be so crass as to out them here, but let’s just say that they share a name with the Spurs’ division) I plopped down on the sofa with my takeout order from my favorite restaurant, California Pizza Kitchen that moms was kind enough to pick up for me and was all set to watch my beloved basketball team whoop on the hapless Miami Meat… err Heat.

So I selected the game from the TiVo menu (I’d instructed her to record it for me) and guess what happens?



It turns out that her TiVo is slightly busted, so occasionally the stuff it records plays back with this severe blue tint. It was like watching the game on a Viagra overdose, minus the raging boner.

And I’m way ahead of you on the obvious, “Not even when Manu dunked?” jokes, so can it, smartasses.

Where was I? Oh right, the blueness. The Spurs parquet court looked like Boise State’s football field. I wasn’t sure if I was watching a basketball game or water polo. To say it was a bit distracting would’ve been an understatement.

Here’s kinda what it looked like…



I SWEAR I'M NOT ON DRUGS.

Anyway, despite that small inconvenience, I was able to enjoy the proceedings for the most part. The Heat are my 2nd least favorite team, so watching them get pounded was thoroughly enjoyable, and I didn’t feel the least bit sorry for that them that their second, (The Diesel) fifth, (White Chocolate) and seventh (James Posey) players were all out of action. This sorry bunch fluked their way into a title last season because of a remarkable convergence of a handful of unlikely scenarios and they were about as worthy champions as the 83-win St. Louis Cardinals this year in baseball.

Consider that in order for Miami to win that

A) A superior Pistons team pretty much had a team wide mutiny on Flip Saunders, led by the shameless and gutless Wallace boys.

B) The refs completely screwed over the Spurs in Games 3 and 4 at Dallas. If we won either game we'd have beaten the Mavs and likely advanced to the Finals.

C) The Mavs had to totally (and enjoyably) choke away a 2-0 lead to a squad that was far inferior to them in every way imaginable except for coaching and the owner's haircut.

We would have soooo swept these guys if we played them. I mean, come on, Shaq was so useless by June that 'Zo Mourning was their best center in the Finals. They're the luckiest organization in all of sports. I'm still recovering from the affects of having to endure watching the two teams I despite the most having to play in the Finals last year. I swear to God I would have preferred the Lakers vs. the Bobcats.


On offense our team executed about as well as it can in the 2nd and 3rd quarters, outscoring Miami 66-44, and it was only that close because a couple of Heat youngsters Earl Barron and Robert Hite were hot from the field. The second quarter surge was led by The Wee Rapping Frenchman (TWaRF) and Bones who had 11 points apiece in the period while the third quarter finishing blow was authored mainly by Timmeh and The Hustlemaker who scored eight each.

Really everyone contributed and did their part. Robert Horry and Francisco Elson both had sneaky good games for glue guys, combining for 5 points, 10 rebounds, 6 assists, 6 blocks, and 2 steals in 39 minutes. Beno helped save Tony’s legs for tonight’s clash with the Mavs by playing 23 minutes and scoring 13 points. He finally shook off his long 3-pointer drought and also managed 3 dimes (and 4 turnovers).

And finally, we got our long awaited look at Jackie Butler. And… I wish we had waited some more. If this is the “in-shape” version, I can’t imagine what he looked like when we signed him in the summer. Obviously 12 minutes isn’t nearly enough to evaluate a player, and we shouldn’t be too hard on him for his rocky debut made in a garbage-time 4th quarter, but I guess I’m guilty of expecting a bit more, especially against the Heat scrubs he was facing. About the only positive signs I saw out of Butler were that he had a nice free throw stroke and that he didn’t keel over and collapse during the game.

Anywho, the game was a rout. No starter outside of Bruce played over 23 minutes and we could not be in better shape physically or mentally to face off against the Mavs and Emperor Commodus

I wonder if Cuban wrote any love letters to his sister on his blog.

Your 3 Stars:

3) Brent Barry – Bones continues to rain down bombs on teams too foolish to keep someone home on him at all times. His three 3s in the 2nd helped turn a one point game after the 1st quarter into a laugher by half time. It’s pretty much a given at this point that he’ll be in Vegas at the All-Star break for the 3-Point Shootout. He’s absolutely insane right now.

2) Manu Ginobili – Don’t want to jinx it, but bit by bit Manu is starting to look like his old self. He scored 17 points on only nine field goal attempts, drilled two of three from deep, (his one miss was a desperation heave late in the shot clock) and he put on a sick stutter move on Udonis Haslem to leave him nailed to the floor before dunking it for the first time this season. He’s starting to take it to the hole with much more frequency of late and doesn’t seem to be worried about getting hurt. Either that or he was so frustrated by all the missed jumpers that he just decided he doesn’t give a shit anymore.

1) Tony Parker – Abused “The Glove” almost to the point of tears in the second quarter, going around the one time Defensive Player of the Year repeatedly to amass 17 points and 4 dimes by halftime as the Spurs trotted out to a 19 point lead. He did play like complete ass for six minutes in the 3rd quarter before Pop pulled him for good though.

Record: 10-2 Streak: W-4
Up Next: Vs. Dallas Mavericks
Now comes Round Two against Fortworth’s foulest, this one at home. Since opening 0-4 the Mavs have righted their ship and have won seven straight, their most recent triumph being a 107-80 drubbing of the Wiz. There’s a chance Josh Howard aka The Big Bug returns from his sprained ankle for this one, but I’m not sure. Either way I expect us to win handily as long as Pop doesn’t use that smallball crap for prolonged stretches and take all our defense and rebounding off the floor. If Howard plays have Manu go right at him offensively and stick Bruce on him defensively. If he doesn’t, then put Bruce on Jet or Stack or whoever you feel their 2nd best scorer is. Just don’t waste him on Dirk. Let Nowitzki get his and shut down everyone else.

Spurs Continue Road Dominance

Game 11 vs. Portland: Spurs 107, Trailblazers 98
Record: 9-2 Streak: W-3

There was lots to like about Monday night's victory over the Trailblazers.

• It was another road win. The Spurs are off to a 6-0 start -- the only team undefeated on the road.
  
• It was a back-to-back game, which have been historically problematic, to say the least. The Spurs had lost 2 of 3 second night games this year going into this one, including a loss to perhaps the league's worst team.
  
• Manu Ginobili had a breakout game, finally. Hard to believe it took him 11 games to score more than 20 points. His 25 included 18 in the fourth and 3 of 4 from behind the arc.
  
• Zach Randolph continues to put up great numbers for my fantasy team. I was a little nervous after I traded Skinny for Z-bo, but so far he hasn't disappointed.

Nate Robinson stuffs Yao Ming

Other popular Google searches for this tasty little clip might be:
"Nate Robinson block Yao Ming"
"Nate Robinson blocks Yao Ming"
"Yao Ming blocked by Nate Robinson"
"Yao Ming rejected by Sneezy"
"Yao Ming retires in shame after physics-defying block by midget"
"Nate Robinson takes all 10 slots in ESPN's countdown"
"Mini Me gets revenge for Apple commercial snub"
"Nate Robinson provides endless laughs for stoned gangbangers"
"5'9" human kangaroo humiliates 7'5" Commie Frankenstein"
"Nate Robinson sets TiVo record for most replays"

And I think that's all the Google sluttiness I'm capable of tonight. Here's the video you're looking for, John:



Check out our site while you're here - if you're a Spurs fan, that is. Otherwise, go fist yourself. Especially if you're a Lakers or Mavs fan.

And now here's a photo of Kobe crying:

Just my little way of giving Funk a shout out.

Steve Kerr Ranks Spurs #2

What a weird start to the 2006-2007 season. Carmelo Anthony and Michael Redd lead the league in scoring, not AI or Kobe. And Salt Lake City hosts the NBA's hottest team. Yes, that's no mistake.

Steve Kerr ranks the Spurs second behind the Jazz, but what's weird is the list of teams that fill out the top 10.

1. Utah Jazz (9-1)
   
2. San Antonio Spurs (8-2)
   
3. Los Angeles Clippers (6-2)
   
4. Cleveland Cavaliers (7-3)
   
5. Los Angeles Lakers (7-3)
   
6. Orlando Magic (7-3)
   
7. Golden State Warriors (7-3)
   
8. New Orleans Hornets (7-3)
   
9. Houston Rockets (6-4)
   
10. Dallas Mavericks (5-4)

Notice who is missing from this list: Detroit, Miami, Phoenix, New Jersey. And Dallas barely made the Top 10. It's a long season, though. Come May, we may look back on the first month and have a laugh. I thought the same thing last year when the Jazz and Clippers got off to fast starts.

Your Cowtown is Boring and You've Made Timmy Angry.

Game 10 @ Sacramento: Spurs 108, Kings 99




As my good friend Joey Russo would say,

"Whoa!"

Where the hell did that come from?

That right there folks was vintage Tim Duncan right there. We so take the guy for granted. Sure, Manu had his comet-like two month run in the '04-05 playoffs, and it could be argued that Tony was our team MVP last season since he was our most consistent player, but c'mon, we're kidding ourselves. It's always been Tim. Always. He's the guy. Not only that, but he's the best power forward, people. Ever.

You want your All-Time NBA Starting Five? It's this dude at the point, you know who at the two, a superfreak at center, the best trash talker ever at small forward, and Tim motherfuckin' Duncan at power forward. That's your list. No arguments, no debates, I'm not listening.

Does he play like this as often as he used to? No, he's 30. The point though is that he can. And when he does, we're the baddest team in all the land. I can't even describe the feeling, it's like I want to put it on a neon orange T-shirt.



If we can get performances like this even three times out of every seven in the playoffs, it should be enough for another ring, no matter how awful Finley and Horry play, no matter how shaky Manu's shot is, and no matter how much Tony "le trou noir" hogs the ball.

I think.

(Have fun with the Altavista Babelfish translation of that one, kids)

Besides Timmeh's heroics, there isn't a whole lot to say about this one. As expected, Bowen struggled with another muscular ballhandling three in Tru Warier. Shareef gave us fits early on as well. For a while it was looking hairy there at the wrong end of a 48-41 score, but I wasn't ever really worried since most of Sacramento's baskets were jumpers. An 8-0 run right before half really took the piss out of them and their shooting percentage dropped back down to Earth in the 2nd half to make it a pretty one-sided affair.

Sacramento isn't awful, it's just that Artest is the only guy on the team remotely capable of playing any defense, and even he's not as committed to it as he used to be. Hiring Eric Musselman was an odd choice for the Maloofs if you ask me, since the whole reason he got canned by the Warriors (besides the teamwide mutiny that is) is that he couldn't get it through to his players' heads to play defense. It doesn't look early on like these guys are listening either. It was getting almost painful to watch there at the end. After every stoppage of play he'd be pleading with his guys to get a stop on this possession, and without fail we'd either get an easy bucket from Tim or a wide open look from three from whoever.

Nobody really went off for us besides Duncan. Barry looked like he was on his way to a big night, but he slammed his head againt the Kings' Ronnie Price's (who?) shoulder late in the 2nd quarter and wasn't much of a factor for the rest of the game. Except for the goofy white headband. That was priceless.

Anyway...

Your 3 Stars

3. Manu Ginobili- One the surface, another miserable shooting night -- 4 of 12 -- but thanks to free throws, he did manage to squeeze out 16 points out of those 12 shots and his bomb right at the end of the 3rd quarter put this game to bed. Also loved that one bounce pass in traffic for an Oberto lay-up. I don't understand why he's shooting so many threes though, especially when his stroke is so off. 7 attempts tonight? Ridiculous. He shouldn't take more than two or three a game. Pop might need to give him the red light here until he starts playing more aggressively.

2. Fabricio Oberto- A sneaky good performance from Fab-O. 11 2nd half points, and he repeatedly buried open mid-range jumpers to keep the Kings at arms length. His interior D was pretty decent too.

1. Tim Duncan- Really, he deserves to be first, second, and third star all by himself. 35 and 14! 13 of 17 from the field, 9 of 11 from the line, 7 offensive rebounds. Yowza. Obviously his finest performance thus far in the season. I wonder what he'll have left in him for tomorrow against a rested Zach Randolph, who's been playing very well so far.

Record: 8-2 Streak: W-2
Up Next: @ Portland Trailblazers
Another cursed second night of a back-to-back. So far we're 1-2 in these. And the Blazers have been spunkier so far than I anticipated, winning five of their first eleven games, including a palindromiffic 86-68 thumping of the Nets in Jersey. Howevuh, we have a significant advantage in the backcourt, and we're a lot better at shooting threes. I'd be a bit flummoxed if we drop this one. Flummoxed and sleepy.

I'm already going to have to miss "Heroes" for this, so they God damn better win. Spurs by a dozen.

Adam Morrison Made Me Cry... but not really

Game 8 vs. Charlotte: Bobcats 95, Spurs 92 OT
Record: 6-2 Streak: L-1

Well how was that? Was that fun for you? Did that taste good?

We just got whooped on by the love child of Larry Bird and Jack White.
+ =

I like Adam Morrison A LOT, but he looks like he's going to be this generation's Allan Houston, the ultimate 25-1-1 guy.



And why was he allowed to go off, boys and girls? Because was “guarding” him all night.

Remember a couple of years ago when Bowen would have long stretches of defensive dominance with an occasional lapse of toastage? Now we’re witnessing long stretches of toastage with the occasional spell of competence.

Plus, Pop was leaving him out there in our dreaded SMALLBALL lineup. I thought the whole point of smallball was to score. Why even have Bruce out there if you’re trying to score, dummy? I’d have preferred to see Bones play more.

Bowen wasn't the only culprit though, not by a long shot. Tony had a ghastly six turnovers and went through several periods of the MeMeMes.

You wanna know what the difference is between how Manu thinks and how Tony thinks?
A)
B)

But it looks like the biggest problem was that we're just too damn old. Plantar fasciitis or no, back-to-backs are not going to be kind to us this year. Our guys just don't have the legs for it. And it was a mistake by coach to not play any bench guys in the OT, at least for a minute or two. Tim and Manu were exhausted. We should have given them a blow for a few possessions and unleashed them for the final three minutes.

Anyway, don't be fooled by the lopsided offensive rebound numbers. We had 24 of them because A) We missed so many bunnies B) The Bobcats were so small C) Okafor tries to block everything and takes himself out of position. The 2 for 17 on threes didn't help any either. And how do we only force 12 turnovers in 53 minutes against the club who was leading the league in giveaways? Not very hustleriffic, methinks.

Just chalk it up to a night where we couldn't throw it into the ocean and move on. It's a good lesson for the fellas that we can't just turn it on for five minutes a game and expect to win. I'm a bit concerned we're falling into the Pistons/Heat/Shaq-Kobe Lakers-like pattern of only turning the switch on when you have to. C'mon Pop, whip these guys into shape!

Your 3 Stars...(such as they were)

3) Tim Duncan- Another ho-hum 24-13 looks great on the statsheet, but he should have gone to the rim a lot harder in the 4th quarter and OT instead of trying to lay everything up all Rasho like.

2) Manu Ginobili- Probably as great a game as anybody can play with a 3 for 14 shooting line. 12 rebounds, 7 dimes, (easily would have had the triple double if guys could hit some more shots for him) and a huge block of Okafor at the end of regulation that led to a couple of free throws to tie the game up and send it to OT. He...just...couldn't....make....anything though. How did that three at the end not go in? At least he was taking it to hole strong.

1) Michael Finley- A season high 17 for the Findog, and he pretty much kept us in it during the 1st half. While I know it's an encouraging sign in the big picture, you can't hide that his shooting tailed off in the 4th quarter and OT along with everyone else.

Up Next: Vs. Chicago Bulls
Should be another tough night on the offensive end for us, but the good news is they can't shoot it either. Still, I'm gonna let you in on a little secret. This is a '06-07 Finals preview. Don't tell anyone. I'm just happy they're finally letting Nocioni start. Fantasy points! Anyway, the boys couldn't possibly drop two in a row at home, could they? Huh? Spurs by a touchdown.

Bench Lifts Spurs Over Rockets

Robert and Francisco and Beno, off the bench, were the reasons we ended up with this victory"
-- Gregg Popovich

Game 7 vs. Houston: Spurs 92, Rockets 84
Record: 6-1   Streak: W-5

This is all you need to know about last night ...

Tim Duncan had 19 points and 15 rebounds, but the game began to turn when he was on the bench and the Spurs rallied from 19 points down to win 92-84.

Gregg Popovich benched Tony Parker along with Duncan and the rest of the starters after Houston built a 74-55 lead in the third quarter.

With the two All-Stars out, the Spurs mounted a 20-1 spurt, holding Houston without a field goal for eight minutes. Beno Udrih sank two 3-pointers and turned a steal into a breakaway layup to cut the Rockets' lead to 75-71 heading to the fourth.

"Our bench did one heck of a job to get us back in it," Duncan said. "Pop took us out because we were turning the ball over and not making shots. But our bench came in and they were the difference."

Francisco Elson had 12, Udrih added 11 and Robert Horry had 10 off the bench to propel the Spurs to their seventh straight win over the Rockets.

Isiah Thomas is a F@#*ing Dork... and other observations

Game 6: Vs. New York: Spurs 100, Knicks 92
Record: 5-1 Streak: Won 4

Ugh. Sorry it took me a while to post this. It was hard to find the inspiration. Let’s be honest, the less said about this one, the better. It is physically painful to watch the Knicks play. 11 freakin’ assists on 36 made baskets! How can their fans put up with this one-on-one basketball night after night? I mean, I guess Rucker Park is the home of such nonsense, but this is the Knicks! Those 1970 and 1973 title teams were the paramount examples of team play in this league, right? Right?

And now they’ve sunk to this. Their coach/GM/jester/bully threatens to murder our small forward.

Way to go tough guy. Your players were so inspired by your machismo that they dropped a home game to Cleveland. Do you have any idea how crappy your team has to be to lose at home to Cleveland?

Um.. wait..

Okay, so that was a bad example.

The bottom line is I'm glad we don't have to play them anymore. Sure, we'd win every game, Isiah said so himself, according to the New York Times:
Asked if he was glad that the two incidents raised awareness of a dangerous defensive tactic, Thomas said:

“No. If nothing else, I’m glad we don’t play San Antonio anymore. Because chances are we would be 0-3, then 0-4 and 0-5 and 0-6 against them. So I’m glad they’re out of the way and we’ve absorbed our two losses and we can be done with them.”

I agree with Coach Psycho. I'm glad we don't play your uglyass team anymore either. And losses aren't the only things you're absorbing buddy. Your center seems to be "absorbing" every doughnut in sight and your organization is "absorbing" one ridiculous contract after another.

Take a look at this...
NEW YORK KNICKS
Player Salary
Stephon Marbury $17.18 million
Steve Francis $15.07 million
Eddy Curry $8.17 million
Quentin Richardson $7.52 million
Malik Rose $7.52 million
Jamal Crawford $7.2 million
Jerome James $5.4 million
Jared Jeffries $5.21 million
Channing Frye $2.32 million
Renaldo Balkman $1.19 million
Nate Robinson $1.18 million
David Lee $926,040
Mardy Collins $899,880
Kelvin Cato $744,551
Other $36.4 million
Total $117.024 million

Now look at us...
SAN ANTONIO SPURS
Player Salary
Tim Duncan $17.42 million
Tony Parker $9.45 million
Manu Ginobili $8.25 million
Brent Barry $5.11 million
Eric Williams $4.29 million
Bruce Bowen $3.75 million
Robert Horry $3.31 million
Francisco Elson $3 million
Michael Finley $2.88 million
Fabricio Oberto $2.5 million
Jackie Butler $2.2 million
Matt Bonner $2 million
Beno Udrih $967,920
Jacque Vaughn $744,551
James White $412,718
Other $40,000
Total $66.366 million


Now a couple of things stand out here. First of all, our starting backcourt is making a combined 17.7M. Good scratch, for sure. But not quite the 32.25M their starting backcourt is getting paid. Now you can call me a homer if you want, but I like Tony and Manu more than Starbury and Franchise. That's just me though. Other people might disagree. Also, we're paying guys who aren't on our roster 40K. They're paying guys no longer on their roster 36.4M. So I guess if I was the guy responsible for Column A coaching vs. the guy responsible for Column B, I might be in a bad mood too. No wonder Pop has that smirk in the picture...

A guy who grew on me a bit in this second game is their color guy, Walt Frazier. He had a couple of gems I thought were worth noting.

Of Tony Parker: "He's leading the team in both swishes and dishes." Nice!

Of the Knicks being down at least 10+ points in every game thus far and having to come back: "They're showing fortitude, but not aptitude."
That's just quality right there, is what that is.

Anyway, I was bored, so I charted the game, hockey style...

Player Playing Time Shifts Longest Shift +/-

Duncan 32:40 4 10:30 12
Parker 36:00 4 9:50 12
Oberto 18:00 4 6:00 6
Horry 10:30 2 8:00 6
Bowen 35:30 5 10:30 5
Finley 20:20 3 10:00 2
Barry 17:40 3 8:00 -1
Elson 23:20 4 9:50 -2
Udrih 17:20 3 8:40 -4
Bonner 2:00 1 2:00 -7
Vaughn 2:00 1 2:00 -7

Most of it is about what'd you'd expect, right? Except you're saying, "Dude you forgot Manu." Well could you blame me? He had a pretty forgettable night, no? 3 of 9 shooting, 6 rebounds, 2 assists, 2 steals, 4 turnovers. Nothing to get excited about.

Howevuh...

Ginobili 25:00 6 5:50 +18

+ 18 in only 25 mins of playing time. Now maybe it was just a coincedence that he happened to be on the floor when we were going on runs, even if it didn't appear that he was directly involved in them. But, riddle me this... if he was soooo bad against the Kings and the Mavs in the playoffs last year, how come he led the team in +/- in both series? How come he led the entire league with a + 169 for the '04-05 playoffs (the next closest Spur was Horry with +112)? Good things just magically seem to happen when Manu is on the floor. It must all be one big coincedence.

Now if he could only start taking it to the hole and cramming it on people again, we could make the visual evidence coorelate with the statistical evidence...

Your 3 Stars...

3) Francisco Elson- 9 points (on 4 of 5 shooting), 9 rebounds, and 2 assists in just 23 minutes off the bench. His only bugaboo was the 5 turnovers, but whaddaya gonna do? Mr. Perfecto on the other hand managed a single point and was oh-for-four from the field. Still, the two of them combined for 17 rebs from the center spot in 41 minutes.

2) Tim Duncan- Another typically awesome night from The Big Fundamental: 24-16-2-3. And a spectacularly awful 4 of 12 from the line. At least he isn't making awful movies or rap albums.

1) Tony Parker- 33 points on 12 of 17 shooting and 6 assists. Yeah, great. But how come he never had another assist in the last three quarters, huh? And how come he missed three free throws? And what's with that stupid accent? Does he thing it's sexy or something? Pass the ball to Manu you freakin' Frog! You think your girlfriend is so hot? Huh? Well she's cheating on you so there. I bet she totally slept with Christian Bale on the set of Harsh Times. Actually, Bale is too good for her. She probably did J.K. Simmons, the guy who played Schillinger the Neo-Nazi on Oz. Boy you Frenchies really put up a hell of a fight against them Germans in WWII, huh?

(Um...sorry. I just lost time for the last five minutes. What happened? That happens to me sometimes.)

Next Game: @ Houston Rockets
::sniffs:: What's that? It smells like... like... a loss! I don't like that smell.

Oberto, Duncan Define OT Win Over Suns

"He's the ugliest productive player I've ever been around.
He looks like a bull in a china shop out there."
--Coach Gregg Popovich on Fabricio Oberto



Game 5 vs. Phoenix: Spurs 111, Suns 106
Record: 4-1   Streak: W-3

I came home last night and turned on the Spurs-Suns game to find San Antonio down by seven, 88-81, with just over 7 minutes left in the fourth quarter. I was surprised, but not too worried about the prospect of the Spurs making it two Ls in a row at home, after dropping their home opener against LeBron’s Cavaliers. (That man is younger than most of the league’s rookies and already one of the all-time greats, as far as I'm concerned. Can you believe that shit?)

But things changed pretty quickly. I could only scratch my head at the announcement that Oberto was 10-of-10 from the field with 20 points. (So much for Michael's prediction that Oberto would "never be able to see more than 18 minutes on the floor with us.")

Most fans will remember two things about this game: 1) the Spurs came back from being 9 down in the 4th quarter to win decisively in OT, and 2) Oberto finished the game with 22 points, shooting 11-for-11.

What I’ll remember is that Tim Duncan utterly and absolutely choked when the game was on the line.

Tim committed an offensive foul against Kurt Thomas with 6:32 left in the fourth and the Spurs trailing 88-81. He then slammed the ball down and gestured wildly to the refs. NBA coaching legend and commentator Hubie Brown said:

BROWN: Wow. Watch out here, Timmy. You don’t need a T right here. You don’t need that.

What got into Tim's head? He's been in this league long enough to know not to act out like that.

The Spurs would go on a 19-9 run in the last five minutes to finally take a one point lead with just seconds left. And then guess what?

Tim Duncan blew it at the free throw line.

With the Spurs up 101-100, Shawn Marion fouled Duncan. Duncan then proceeded to miss, not one, but BOTH free throws. Oberto came in for Finley and fouled Raja Bell. With one second left and the Suns down by just a point, Bell had a chance to win it. Thankfully, he missed his second free throw, and the game went into overtime.

This wasn't the kind of game that anyone expected from Oberto, let alone our resident Oberto lover. But I expect better leadership and free throw shooting from Tim Duncan if the Spurs are going to win another championship, and I didn't see much of either last night.

Almost Choked on The Big Apple

Game 4: @ New York: Spurs 105, Knicks 93

Already this back-to-back junk is getting real old. We just played one of the three or four worst teams in the league -and barely won. We made ten more three pointers than them -and barely won. We shot 83% from the FT line –and barely won. Our point guard matched his season total in assists in this one game –and barely won. Our starting backcourt combined for 60% shooting and 17 dimes –and barely won. Robert Horry mercifully didn’t play, not even for a second-and still, we barely won.

Is anyone else troubled by this? As my noted colleague
Screamin A. puts it,



AP Photo Stephen A. Smith/by Aaron Stampler



"DA NEW YORK KNICKS ARE TEH-RIH-BULL"

This does not bode well for the fifteen other second nights of B2B's we've got this season, methinks. Oh well, a win's a win I guess. It's not like I'm foolishly gambling on the point spread or anything. (I save that idiocy for the NFL.)

Anyway, some news and notes from this one:


Spurs’ biggest lead: 23 points, 52-29, 3:33 left in the 2nd quarter.
Spurs’ narrowest lead: 1 point, 92-91, 4:05 left in the 4th quarter.






Spurs turnovers the first 22 minutes: 0
Spurs turnovers the last 26 minutes: 15




Findog: 1-8 for the game, 6-29 (.207 FG%) for the season.







Our two centers, Fabcisco Elerto and Franricio Obson combined for 8 points, 10 rebounds, 2 blocks, 1 assist, 3 turnovers, and 11 fouls in 41 minutes. Yech.


Isiah Thomas benched the entire starting lineup to start the 2nd half. To his dismay Pop didn't reciprocate.


AP Photo Eddy Curry/by Aaron Stampler Eddy Curry tried to pass it to a teammate in the post with four Spurs in the way between him and his (I’m assuming) intended target. Shockingly, it didn’t work out for him.







Games Manu Has Gone Without An Injury: 4
(But yesterday was a close call)





Beno Udrih had another decent night with eight points, one assist, and most importantly, ZERO turnovers in 16 minutes, but it has to be noted that a large chunk of the Knicks 20-2 4th quarter came with him on the floor running our offense.

I won't even comment on Tim and Bruce because they were boring and par for the course.

Oh and one last thing...

CLYDE FRAZIER NEVER SHUTS UP!!!
Dude, the color guy isn't supposed to talk three times more than the play-by-play guy. You don't have to offer your opinion on what happened or what should have happened after every...single...play. God was that painful to have to listen to. (But still better than the MNF dopes.)


Your 3 Stars

3) Manu Ginobili - 15 points, 7 dimes, 4 rebounds in his customary third wheel role. Coulda had a double double if Finley and Bonner could knock down some shots. I particularly enjoyed three sequences of his last night...

a) Mercilessly drills a wide open three while Stevie Franchise was rolling around on the other end of the floor in agony (the victim of another "Bruce Bowen Special") and the Knicks were too dumb to stop play with a foul.
b) A 40 foot bounce pass on the run to a streaking Beno for a lay-up. Just sweet.
c) Near the end of the game, the Knicks have no idea whether to foul or not, there's a lot of confusion on the floor, Clyde Frazier is going nuts on the TV, and Gino runs the shotclock to two before canning a jumper while being fouled. And one.

2) Brent Barry- Drilled five more threes off the bench, including a hellacious one from 30 feet in the 4th quarter. Unless I miss my guess, his combined 35 points in back-to-back games has to be a Spurs high for him. I think that James White signing might of lit a fire under his butt to either play well or find a real estate agent. For the season Barry is now 10 of 12 on threes and 0 of 2 on layups. The most fun I ever have watching the Spurs is when he, Manu, and Beno are all on the court at once. The Pale Triangle is Maravich-like hotdogging at its finest.

1) Tony Parker- The wee Frenchman must have had a pregame lecture from Pop that went something like, "Yo French fry, if I wanted a point guard who can't pass I'd coach the Knicks. Start finding the open man or I'm giving Eva Manu's phone number. He speaks Spanish you know..." Tony responded with by far his best game of the season with 24 points (on 11-16 shooting) and 10 helpers. A couple of the dazzlers were an alley-oop that Duncan finished nicely and a behind the back flick to Brent for a corner three. Most of his eleven bucks came on jumpers too, and I'm not sure if that's a good thing or not. That he made his first two three point attempts of the season has me concerned.

Record: 3-1 Streak: W-2
Up Next: Vs. Phoenix

Tony has an excellent chance to repeat his 1st Star effort since the Suns collectively and Steve Nash in particular play no defense. He's going to be able to do whatever he wants all game. The key to beating them will be the same as always, stop their transition buckets and limit their open looks from deep. Pop will probably try to establish Tim and Elson early and try to take take advantage inside, especially when Kurt Thomas is off the floor. Wouldn't kill us to get some offensive boards in this one either, but it'll have to come solely from the bigs as the other guys will have to race back to limit the Suns' break.

Suck it, Oberto Haters!

The guy will never be an All-Star, but Fabricio "Oh Boy!" Oberto showed some of his potential in helping to save the Spurs' asses en route to a comeback win over the Raptors. I think his performance (12 points, 9 rebounds, and double-digit instances of general badassness) convinced even more people that the Spurs' FO knew what they were doing when they made their frontcourt moves this summer. He looked great playing alongside my man Frankie Elson.

I've been meaning to post that in addition to being a tough mofo, a great passer, and a smart all-around player who helps facilitate other players' success, there's yet another reason to like Fabri: he's got good taste in music.

Bones actually went on tour with PJ over the summer, and that only deepens my already profound respect and appreciation for the man.

We Were All Witnesses... to a Royal Beatdown

Well, there goes the dream of an undefeated season. The Spurs got whupped on by Cleveland up, down, and sideways. How thorough was the beating? Well, the Cavs shot it better from the field, from downtown, and from the line. I think they even had more dunks. In fact I’m sure of it.

Also, they out rebounded us, both offensively and overall, had more steals, more blocks, fewer turnovers, and even managed to outscore our bench despite getting only a paltry 16 points from their reserves.

(We got an even paltrier 15.)

So in short, it was fugly out there.

I was going to point out how the “I’m a witness” catchphrase was perfectly fitting here for the ballgame since “Witness” was a movie about rape and Bowen got unmercifully abused by BronBron on national television all game, but it turns out that I got my Kelly McGillis movies confused. “The Accused” was the rape one while “Witness” was the Amish murder one with Harrison Ford.

So I’m not that clever.

What does this loss mean in the long run? Not a damn thing. If the game was in Cleveland on the second night of a back-to-back, I wouldn’t have given the Spurs a shot going in, but because it was the home opener, and because the fans were going to be stoked about the opening night win at _allas, I thought maybe the energy of the crowd would’ve inspired the boys to give a better effort.

Nope.

They won the one they wanted to win and treated their first home game like it was just another contest in the middle of February.

Culprits? There were plenty.

Piling on the Pylon

Not only was the spectacularly overrated Bruce helpless against the chiseled James, but unlike the Mavs game he couldn’t give us anything on offense either, shooting only 1 of 5 for two points. So far our Defensive Player of the Year hopeful has given up 56 points combined in his two individual matchups to Bronie and Josh Howard aka “The Big Bug.”

Looks like they signed James White just in time because Bruce Bowen has turned into Bruce Pylon.

Also, Robert Horry’s jumper is still in deep hibernation, Michael Finley couldn’t find the range, and Game 1 standout Francisco Elson was in too much foul trouble the whole night to be much of a factor.

The real goathorns belong to Coach Wino. Once again, I have no idea what he was doing out there. How come every time Manu hits a couple of shots, Popovich yanks him from the game right away? I mean god forbid we go on a run or anything. Gino was 5 of 7 for 13 points in the first half, pretty much our only guy who had any semblance of life, and somehow he didn’t get off his next field goal attempt until less than a minute remained in the 3rd quarter. That’s just bad coaching, pure and simple. Of course Manu finished 5 of 11 with 14 points. Pop completely took him out of his rhythm.

And what’s up with his use of Bones Barry? One night the guy doesn’t get off the bench, the next he doesn’t play until halfway through the 3rd. What is this Doc Rivers bullshit? Can we make have kind of rotation please? Brent didn’t get a shot off in 12 minutes.

It also wouldn’t have been a bad idea to put Bowen on their second best guy Hughes, double team LeBron at all times, and make Eric Snow beat them. Just a thought. It’s not a good sign when the coach looks just as disinterested in the proceedings as the players.

Your 3 Stars (Such as they were)… Pretty boring today, just the big three. Expect that to be the case, in some combination or another, a lot this year.

3. Manu Ginobili - As I said, he singlehandedly kept the team in it in the first half, but he couldn’t get anything going in the second. Either his legs weren’t there, or they didn’t look for him. Probably a little of Column A, a little of Column B.

2. Tony Parker - Another gutty effort on his sprained ankle, and he totally dominated his matchup with Snow, as expected. He made a couple of mistakes overpenetrating, as always, but his assist numbers would have looked better if anybody could’ve knocked down a shot.

1. Tim Duncan – Struggled for most of the game, but had that one heroic five minute stretch late in the 4th to almost bring us all the way back. While 25-12-5 looks good on the surface, he did have five turnovers (including a couple of gruesome passes) and was a horrid 11-19 from the line. The Cavs had no answers for him, just like we had no answers for James. The difference is that they went to LeBron the whole game instead of the very end.

Season Record: 1-1 Streak: L – 1
Up Next: @ Toronto Raptors

This could’ve been a loss for us if we came out on top vs. Cleveland, but I think a grouchy bunch of mofos will be taking the floor in Toronto. Duncan especially will be pissed because of the ridiculous noon starting time.



I would not want to be the Raptors on Sunday.

Bramlet's Giblets: November 4, 2006

Yes, the Spurs got spanked on their own floor by LeBron and Co. last night. But despite that ugly fact, it’s a good day to be a Spurs fan. Of course, the astute and loyal fan will ask, “When is it not?” The astute and loyal fan is a smartass. Of course it’s always a good day to be a Spurs fan—my stating it is merely a rhetorical flourish to emphasize all the reasons the last week or so have given us to be especially happy:

• Many NBA pundits are picking the Spurs to win it all this year (or at least get to the Finals), including Charles Barkley, Kenny The Jet, Steve Kerr, Jack McCallum, Marty Burns, and Mike “The Wrath” Khan. (What a cool last name that guy has. I would totally throw my head back and yell “KHAAAAAN!!!!” if I ever met him. I’m sure he’s heard it a million times before, but I don’t mind being predictable and clichéd if it means I get to go Shatner on someone’s ass.) Jolly good of you pundit bastards to try to jinx us, but the Spurs will be more than good enough to overcome your weak-ass reverse Mojo. Some of these pundits (such as KHAAAN!!!) are also picking TD to win the MVP award. While I think Timmy will be as impressive as ever and will have what will be perceived as a comeback year, it will be nigh impossible for him to win it over guys like LeBron, Carmelo, and Dwyane [“Sic”] Wade—fantastic young players who will have to carry their teams on their backs and in their jocks. The numbers these guys will put up, and the fact that they don’t have Manu Ginobili and Tony Parker to help them carry the load, will (rightly) weigh too heavily in their favor. But individual awards don’t matter. What matters is that a lot of great (and a few not-so-great) basketball minds, including many of the NBA’s general managers, recognize the truth that should bring a year’s worth of joy to the heart of every Spurs fan: that our boys are going to bodyslam, hogtie, and gag Larry O’Brien (gimp style) and bring him back home to San Antonio.
  
• The Spurs kicked Maverick ass twice in one week. Although the first of those victories was a preseason game, it sure looked to me like the Mavericks wanted to win that one. And then the Spurs went into their gym a week later, took a few good jabs, and seized the game by the nads in the fourth quarter, just the way Bramlet likes it.
  
• Although Bramlet admits to being a bit disappointed in some aspects of the Spurs’ offseason moves—that we didn’t manage to either bring Scola over or trade him, that Javtokas doesn’t seem to have been worth bringing over, that we didn’t get J.R. Smith—it looks as if the Spurs’ roster is in great shape after all. Matt Bonner is a tough, blue-collar bomber who will probably be a significant contributor after he adjusts to the Spurs’ system and style of play, Jackie Butler’s drool-inducing potential suggests that he will eventually take over the Spurs’ starting center spot, and yesterday the Spurs finally picked up Bruce Bowen’s understudy, one James “Tiberius” White. Scuttlebutt among Spurs fans is that the FO wanted this guy in this year’s draft, and thanks to a roster jam in Indiana, they’ve now got him. Supposedly Rick Carlisle was in tears when he announced the cut, saying that it was the hardest cut he’s ever had to make. Peter Holt may be a “thrifty” owner, but at least he’s shown that he’s willing to pick up contracts of guys who the FO apparently believes will be important to the success of the team, now and in the future. Devin and Melvin, we love you guys, but White seems to have serious, serious upside, especially in the hands of Pop, Bruce, and the Spurs’ staff. He will give the Spurs’ aging, not-so-athletic roster a huge boost.
  
• Of course, for those who are actually paying attention instead of just buying the media’s lazy mantra about the Spurs’ current rotation players being old, our long-term situation is actually quite good: Jackie is 21, TP and Beno are 24, Bonner is 26, Scola (if he ever comes over) is also 26, we have a couple of promising under-21 players developing in Europe (Mahinmi and Sanikidze), and now we have White, who’s 24. All of these guys have significant potential, and they have smart, savvy veterans to learn from, as well as a front office and coaching staff who know how to develop young talent. Add to this the fact that the Spurs FO will have great contract flexibility (as of the summer of 2008, the only contract obligations they’ll have will be to Timmy, Tony, and Manu), and it’s safe to assume that the Spurs will be kicking ass for years to come.
  
• In the short term, Frankie Elson is the most promising of the new players. He’s already showing what he can do in a good system, with smart players around him who know how to take advantage of his athleticism. He improved rapidly as the preseason progressed, and two good showings against the Mavs in a week can’t be a fluke. Elson is going to be a real threat on both ends of the court and will help us match up against the NBA’s new generation of mobile and athletic bigmen. Imagine the Spurs’ transition attack with any combination of TP, Manu, TD, Francisco, Brent, Beno, and Finley on the court. It will be a thing of fearsome beauty.

By the way, dear readers, if anyone is wondering when I’m going to provocatively answer Michael’s provocative response to my provocative post in defense of Pop’s coaching decisions, well, I thought I’d give the new guy the spotlight for a while, but I’ll fire back soon. In the meantime, I’ll just express my admiration for his eloquence and prolificness (prolificity? prolifitude?). You haven’t changed my mind, Michael, as nothing short of a lobotomy could accomplish that anyway, but you made some good points that deserve a properly derisive, dismissive, scathing response. And you’ll get it.

Faces of the Game: San Antonio 97, Dallas 91

There were four stories in Dallas last night ...

1. Josh Howard committed assualt and battery on Bruce Bowen

Howard was called for a flagrant foul on Spurs tough-guy Bruce Bowen ("A situation happened where I got to protect myself," Howard said) ...

2. Francisco Elson stuffed Erick Dampier

... and Elson got a technical for taunting when he shrieked after a dunk ("All I did was scream!" he protested to officials).

3. Francisco Elson snuffed Erick Dampier

4. Halloween came late to Dallas this year
(Who is that guy behind Pop supposed to be, Paul Revere?)